Help me choose a name.
 
Please pick one:
 
 
Ethan Ho
 
Evan Ho

thanks!

We went to UCI Hospital Fetal Diagnostic Department for our follow up tests this morning.  I was so nervous.  But I was ready to deal with whatever the test results gonna show.  First we talked to the genetics counselor and went over all the possibilites, and also to answer any questions Seb and I may have.  She also asked me if I wanted to do a amniocentesis if the ultrasound showed a cleft lip on our baby.  So I agreed to do the amnio if the ultrasound showed what we didn't want to see. 

Turns out, the doctor couldn't find anything on the ultrasound.  She said everything looked normal to her.  It was an INSTANT relief.  I was so relieved I kept saying thank you in my head.  I can't even express the relief I felt in that moment. 

Just to be on the safe side, the doctor scheduled me for another follow up in 4 weeks, which I'm totally okay with.  But for now, everything IS okay.  The previous ultrasound WAS a mistake.  And I'm really thankful our baby is normal and healthy. 

Our doctor's appointment is tomorrow.

Please let everything be ok.

Back from Vegas for the July 4th weekend.

We were there celebrating one of my best friend's birthday.  We ate, watched The Lion King, and walked around A LOT.  It was nice.  I caught up on sleep.  Slept in both Saturday and Sunday.  I love the curtains in Vegas hotels.  Nice and dark.

I did my 18th week gender ultrasound last Wednesday.  My OB called me Thursday afternoon and told me seems like my baby has a cleft lip or palate (see below for definition).  He quickly described to me the situation and even more quickly told me that is fully repairable soon after birth.

(What Are Cleft Lip and Palate?

Cleft lip and palate are birth defects that happen while a baby is developing in the uterus. During the 6th to 10th week of pregnancy, the bones and tissues of a baby's upper jaw, nose, and mouth normally come together (fuse) to form the roof of the mouth and the upper lip. If the tissue in the developing mouth and the palate don't fuse together, a baby could be born with a condition called cleft lip or cleft palate, or both.)

More on cleft lips/cleft palate http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cleft_lip

I knew right away what it is when he told me.  I felt sad and heartbroken as I listened to him telling me our next step is to do a more thorough ultrasound.  It felt weird to me also because for the past week and a half or so, I've had thoughts about children with a cleft lip.  They say there isn't a reason why this happens to some babies, it just does.

That day at the ultrasound, the technician had a bit of  a hard time getting the image of the baby's face.  It took her more than 5 minutes to capture one image.  I'm really hoping there was a glitch on the screen and all this is a mistake.  There's not a moment I haven't been thinking about this.  Some mornings I wake up feeling positive it's all a misdiagnosis.  Then other mornings I doubt the doctor made a mistake.  I feel so helpless.  And scared.

Our follow up appointment is for this Thursday at 10:00a.m.  I'm really hoping they're going to tell me my baby is fine and I can go home now.  I now know what it truly feels like to just wish your baby to be born healthy and what a blessing that really, really is.

I talked with Seb and also one of my closest girlfriend.  We all agreed, if anything is to go wrong, this is the best thing that can happen in all the bad things.  If it's just a cleft lip or palate, almost all the time these children can grow up to be normal healthy adults.  After correction surgery, most people can't even tell they had this birth deformity.  However, as a mother, I'd much rather not have any birth problems happen to my baby at all.  But if I must face something, yes, let it be only this and I will accept it as a blessing itself it wasn't anything worse.

Seb went to my doc appointment with me today, it's his 1st ultrasound experience.  And we got to find out the gender of our little bun that's been baking for a while in my tummy now.  Ultrasound picture below; see if you can tell what the baby obviously is.  Seb looked genuinely happy and excited to be a part of the appointment and prenatel process, that made me feel more like a family than ever to hear the excitement in his voice when the nurse announced the sex of the little thing who was kicking me at the time.

Though I must say I was a little disappointed our 1st born isn't a girl, I'm still very excited nonetheless.  (Sorry kiddo, I wanted you to have an older sister first.)  According to ancient Chinese, now that I am having a boy, my ranking in the family has RISEN!  But that's only ancient Chinese.  In this life my ranking is always up there.

Here's a picture..

or two....

I'm  in my 18th week.  So far I've gained 9.6 pounds.  I'm feeling pretty good.  My energy level has been great.  I do get tired more easily than the pre-pregnancy days.  But compared to what 1st trimester was like, I'm not complaining.  

My tummy is finally starting to pop out a little.   I'll post some pictures later.

Going to Rowland Heights now for a $15/ hour foot massage and shaved ice now.

Some days I wake up with a ton of energy.  And then some days are just sluggish.  But lately I’ve been pretty consistent with my energy level, feeling pretty good in the morning.  Almost feels normal.  But I use up most of it around 1:00p.m. everyday, like clockwork.

This morning I was CRAVING for hummus.  Stopped by Trader Joe’s on the way to work.  Got some 3 layered hummus, some crackers to go with it, Greek yogurt with honey, and my favorite rosemary chicken with rice pilaf. Can’t wait to eat.  But first I have to wait for this gross nauseating feeling from the prenatal vitamin to go away.  Just took it at 12:20.  And that, like clockwork, goes away in one hour.  I dread taking the vitamin everyday.  For that one hour I feel like gagging and my breakfast about to come back out the way it went in.  Sounds lovely doesn’t it?

But I am happy today is Friday.  Gawd, I LOVE Fridays these days. 

I feel like I barely got enough rest and it’s time to go back to work again.

Lately I’ve stopped feeling as nauseous in the mornings, I’ve started feeling hungry again. I usually have a small breakfast though, since mornings are still iffy as to how I’ll feel after I eat. Actually, I take that back. I’m iffy after I eat all day. Most of the time I feel okay. But no matter how hungry I am, I have to remind myself to eat slowly and don’t over eat. If I do, it’s coming back out in less than an hour. But not over eating isn’t like before anymore; eating a small sensible meal. Not over eating now means eating a teeny-tiny bit at once. Most of the time it’s not very satisfying, but I guess it’s better than feeling sick afterwards. I have no food cravings. Though since being pregnant I have started eating more fruits. Not really because I crave them, but more for the reason that I can usually keep it down and it feels refreshing.

I did do a few things this weekend; watched UP, met up with my mom to shop for her living room furniture set and television, made some food, … what else… that was it. Not much. I managed to get one load of laundry done. Oh, went to 99 Ranch and Costco. I got a huge box of cherries, whole box of mangos, and a gigantic case of oranges. Also a citrus juicer. Fresh orange juice is the best.

Gonna go shower and get ready for bed. Sleep is what I enjoy the most these days, especially now that I get this weird headache that comes and goes. I have a feeling it’s a symptom of pregnancy as well.

Hope everyone had a nice weekend.